Friday, March 25, 2016

...and then I cried during the hospital tour.

Last night, The Dizzle and I had our hospital tour. 

We hopped in the car, did a "let's pretend this is the real thing" drive and made it in 16 minutes from door to door. #nottooshabby

We were in happy spirits, laughing, making "I'm in labor" jokes. You know, the usual first-time parents shenanigans. 

Once we got there, we were joined by about 9 other couples, all in the same happy spirits. After all, this is where we were potentially going to deliver our babies! How exciting, right?!

The nice tour guide, Kimberley, did a great job in explaining what the process would be like on D Day. She was super friendly and informative. I liked Kimberley. Come to think of it, everyone on staff was super friendly and welcoming. Good job, guys.

After the 5 minute intro, she led us all up to the 4th Floor: The Birth Center. She explained that there were 24 Birth "Suites" and they were all private. Which I was happy about, because I'm not about to have this situation:

So in we walked to said "Suite", which let me just say is a word that should be used loosely. I personally don't consider a small twin bed and decorations that look like they're from the early 90's a "suite".  But that's neither here nor there.

About 60 seconds after walking into the room, something shifted in me.

There was just something about being in that room and looking at this little bed where I would be PUSHING A BABY OUT OF MY YOU KNOW WHAT that seemed to hit me and the reality of the situation sunk in. I mean, obviously I know we're having a baby. And obviously this baby has to come out somehow. But just standing there, imagining this actually happening sometime in the next 7 weeks kind of freaked me out. Like, ummm... no. nope. nevermind. don't wanna do this! Peace out everyone.

And then, when I get overwhelmed, I cry of course. Happy, angry, sad: You can usually expect tears.

So then that sweet, sweet husband of mine pulled me close and told me it was okay to be scared and it was all going to be okay and he would be right there next to me the whole time. 

Yeah. Right there next to me on that tiny, tiny mental-institution-looking bed. (I don't know why I have such an issue with this bed! Like, what was I expecting? A luxurious King Size Tempur-Pedic??)

Anyway, I took a few deep breaths and we joined the other couples out in the hallway, whom I'm sure were thinking I was the crazy, hormonal pregnant lady. But really now, how did everyone look so calm??

We finished the tour and then left the hospital; me in a much different state than when entering.

I just need to remember that I am not the first woman to have a baby. This is done all over the world, every single day. Our bodies were made for this. I can do this! I will do this. I have to do this. And then, this one (maybe two?) day of discomfort will be over and the reward we get will be priceless. We'll finally get to meet our sweet, sweet babe and bring him home with us forever. I think that's a pretty good reward, don't you?

Deep breaths. I got this.

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  1. You DO have this! I remember feeling the same way and while I don't recommend that you read my birth story now, it would be a good read AFTER you've given birth. Don't overload yourself with birth stories... just try to relax and know that yes... it is hard. But hard in the best way possible. It is so scary... the unknown. But try to think of it as the "known"... after all, you KNOW that you are going to become a mom. And you know that in the end it will be worth it (the first few months are hard too... so be ready for that).

    Reading back through this, I realize it might sound like a downer. That wasn't the intention. I just mean to say that I remember being so scared of the process. Now that it's over -- I'm not. It didn't go like I had planned but it is still okay. You're going to be okay too! Hang in there!


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  2. Girl, you totally got this.

    But yeah, it's scary as hell. You'll be okay though. In a few weeks you'll be so uncomfortable, that feeling will supersede the fear and you'll be ready to get it over with. ;)

  3. just found your blog and I am so happy I did. I cried during my hospital tour, I actually cried before it even started. You're going to do great! having a baby is terrifying...that I cannot lie about haha. But you're totally right, the reward is the best. ever.

  4. You can do this! Love you so much!

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