Monday, November 18, 2013

We broke the bed...in the least sexiest way possible.

Regardless, it should be shared because everytime I think about it, I still burst out laughing.

So, anyway, this past Friday night, The Dizzle and I were laying in bed, doing our usual random internet perusing. And we came across my birthday post to him and were looking at this photo.


I was telling him how impressed I was that he could actually do that.

Then he says, "You know, I also did the high jump too."

And I was like, wait, what, you did??? Like where you run a little then fling your body over this bar?

And he said, "Yep. I could clear 6 feet 4 inches."



Again. Impressed.

So impressed that I then insisted, "You must show me how this was done right now! Pretend there's a bar over the bed. Start in the kitchen and run to the bed!"

It should be known that at this point, several glasses of wine had been had. Though, I can't guarantee this stupid mistake would not have happened dead sober either.

So anyway. V Dizzle hauls his butt out of bed and into the kitchen. But then a little bit of his newfound 32-year-old wisdom pops into his head and he says, "I'll probably break the bed." So instead, he just shows me in slow-mo how he would run to the bar, then fling his body over the bar, while gently landing on our bed.

But this was not good enough for dear Michelle. Oh no, I wanted the real thing, front and center!

So I said, "No, do it for real! Run like you really ran! Jump like you really jumped!"

And so then he does. All 215 pounds of him.

And what came next was the loudest C R A C K of all!

Because V Dizzle broke the bed. Right in half!

After about 3 seconds of silence, I howled with laughter and fell to the floor! I can only imagine what our neighbors thought.

So, in our drunken stupor, we came up with the perfect plan to mend the situation: Paint cans.


And now, on this Monday morning, those paint cans are still there, providing us a semi-stable bed.

Good ol' Ikea beds for $199.
Good ol' Friday nights that involve high-jumps on the bed.

And that's all I have to say about that.

xoxo



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30 comments:

  1. bhahahaha I kinda wish I would have seen this. AWESOME!

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  2. Lol!! I can totally imagine this. Hilarious!!

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  3. Hahahahahahaha..............Never a dull moment. And if there is one, you quickly remedy that situation, don't you?

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  4. HAHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAHAH oh this is the best. i would have done the same thing which is the exact reason why my bed sits on the floor.

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  5. bzhahahahahahaha holy shit that is awesome.

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  6. hahaha trying not to laugh loud in my cubicle. this is hilarious!

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  7. Stories like this are THE BEST. You two are going to have such amazing stories to tell the kids one day. :)

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  8. hahahaha that is hilarious. the broken bed is well worth the great story that will be for years and years. you guys are way too awesome.

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  9. Hahaha you should've recorded it! Love this!

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  10. You two are way too cool ;) this had me laughing so hard!

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  11. this is awesome. we've only ever broken the bed in non-sexy ways too (i.e. jumping on it in a fit of drunken silliness).

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  12. I love this, so funny. Good thing you had some paint cans handy or you might have been stuck with mattresses and the floor.

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  13. That is the best bed breaking story ever. haha way too funny.

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  14. I would have needed to see that too. Well done!

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  15. That is the most amazing story everrr!

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  16. HAHA! Classic! That is a great story. I'd pay to see that all go down, but I have a pretty good mental picture from this post. That is a great story.
    -Rachel @ <a href= "http://withlove-rachel.com> With Love,Rachel </a>

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  17. Beat you to it. We bought our house in 1995. I hated his furniture from day one (it was his divorce furniture, bought when he moved out of his first house). The living room set included a love seat and a large sofa bed, two end tables and a coffee table. We were spending a New Year's Eve at home together a few years later. We/he built a fire in the fireplace and we settled in to watch some tv together. For some reason we now can't recall, I got up and went into the kitchen to get something. I came back in and for another reason we now can't recall, thought it would be a good idea to jump into the sofa bed (it was open, we were laying in front of the fire and the tv...). It had a metal frame, remember, but nonetheless, it collapsed when I jumped into it. Collapsed, as in broke. Snapped. Into two pieces. Yea, a metal framed sofa bed. I'm so proud...

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  18. I commiserate as I have also broke an ikea bed. Instead of paint cans, I have a weight that has been supporting my bed for 2 years. I obviously work out a lot. :)

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  19. Oh man. This really helped pull me out of my horrible mood. Thank you!

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  20. hahahaha! Dean definitely broke our bed frame because he decided to launch himself onto the bed while chasing the dog. Good decisions made by all! haha

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  21. Seriously laughing so hard I am crying, your post title alone had me very intrigued. Sounds like some shenanigans my other half and I would do!

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  22. I seriously love you (& the Dizzle) and your blog. Makes me smile every time :)

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  23. HAHAHAHAHA that seriously made me laugh out loud!

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  24. HAHHA omg you guys are too much fun. Least it was a cheap bed, I would cry if it were a fancy one.

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  25. This is epic and hilarious and I'm SOOO glad you shared it!

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