Thursday, August 8, 2013

Then he had to go and pull the Trayvon card.

Allow me to share my morning commute with you.

Let's set the scene:

I'm sitting on the bus, headed to work.
Like most mornings, the bus is super packed, crammed full.
Every seat is taken, and there is barely any room left to stand.

Here's the bus driver:


Here's the man sitting directly to my left in the front of the bus:


After a few minutes, we make our first stop so that the lady to my right can get off the bus.
But because the bus is so full, some people standing in the front have to get off the bus just so this lady can have room to get off.

As the original bus go-ers were getting back on the bus, the bus driver loudly says,

"No more people on the bus! There is NO more room! Only the original people can stay!"

But apparently, there was a new bus patron that wanted to squeeze on with everyone else.

She looked a little something like this:


Bus Driver to Blonde: "There is NO room! You're going to have to wait for the next bus!"

Blonde (pointing to a spot): "I can squeeze in right there! There's room right there!"

Bus Driver gets up out of her seat and stands at the door to block the blonde and says, "I said there's no more room! Wait for the Next. Bus."

Blonde: "You're ghetto, but okay."

Bus Driver: "You're ghetto too and you need to respect the rules!"

So now, here's where the guy to my left comes in. Remember him?


He says, quite loudly: "Man, white America needs to wake up!"

Bus Driver: "What'd you say?"

Man: "I said White America needs to wake up!"

Bus Driver: "Yeah they do."

Then the girl directly to my right, standing up, decides to chime in and say, "Ooookkkaayyyy."

She kind of looked like this, in case you were wondering:


So the guy looks to the brunette, says, and I quote, "Trayvon Martin is DEAD. Not YOU!!!"

{silence}

Man: "Yeah, that shut you up."

Meanwhile, I'M sitting right in the thick of it all, between these two, going:


For the rest of the awkward bus ride, the guy would shake his head in disgust every few minutes.
I happened to look over, because I was right next to him, and saw that throughout his head shaking, he was very enthralled with the book he was reading.

In case you were wondering, the book was called: "Mastering the Tarot."

And it had pictures.

Just like these:


So anyway. We got to the stop where the guy needed to get off.

And as he's exiting the bus, he says to the bus driver: "Thank you.... Sorry."

Bus driver says: "It's okay."

THEN, the man gets off the bus, and as he's walking away, throws a fist bump in the air.

Like this:


And I just kept looking around the bus, like, HELLO?! Did anyone see that?
Can we please acknowledge the craziness that just happened??


But, no! No one did a thing or said a thing or gave a knowing look.

Nothing.

So that was my morning.

Who needs reality TV when you've got public transportation?

xoxo

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41 comments:

  1. day made. thank you for your awkward stories.

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  2. bahahahaha I am sitting at my desk at work trying to contain my laughter so my boss doesn't get suspicious. Man, stories like this make me wish I took the bus to work, but not really. So hilarious! Thanks for sharing.

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  3. Maaaaaan...public transportation is entertaining and scary all at the same time. I've been using it my entire teenage and adult life. It's something else.

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  4. Um, that's bizarre. And you're right - the people you encounter on the bus/train make reality TV look boring! My "best" one was a guy who berated a woman for not being able to calm down her crying child. The child wasn't even old enough to walk! Really, dude?

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  5. You're making me miss my bus days and all the entertainment. I've seen some crazies and heard some crazies, but nothing like that!

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  6. yup, Muni stories for the win. I have so many stories about riding that damn bus. And nothing surprises anyone on the Muni.

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  7. hahahahah! You're probably lucky you didn't get a knowing look from across the bus. One funny facial expression and I would have lost it!

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  8. gawd, i would have been so uncomfortable. but that made for a fantastic story (especially with the pictures).... without diving too deep into the racial side of things.

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  9. The fist bump is the best part! hahaha. Oh that's awkward.

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  10. I just about died laughing as I read this...holy awkwardness!

    Chels @ Red Velvet Rooster

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  11. I miss out so much but living in BFE and not getting to ride a bus.

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  12. Bahahahha this is AMAZING. Way better than reality TV, which I can hardly watch anyway with no cable. #boo

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  13. Omg, this is so San Francisco - I love it!!! When we were in SF we got into a taxi one evening and the cab driver started driving with his knees at break neck speed while playing his clarinet... it was craaaazy...

    xxx
    Jenna

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  14. Bahahahaha. I seriously just laughed out loud. People get SO CRAZY on public transit. Like far too crazy. I usually get (at least) ne interesting story every week from the bus.

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  15. OMG OMG OMG wow, this is just crazy. also i really enjoyed the people that you put there. a lot.

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  16. Way... you just made my day with this... seriously laughing out loud because it's so true, public transportation is such a hot mess. It's amazing no one has turned it into reality tv yet.

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  17. I LOVE it! Too funny. That's what happens when you get this random cross section of people thrown together like jury duty.

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  18. oh my gawd.. STOP over this post right now. i'm seriously cracking up at my desk. what a funny ass post and thank you for turning the end of my afternoon into a smile!

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  19. oh. my. god. I take the bus from NJ and the NYC subway daily, so i feel your pain.

    some days the crazies come out in droves. (this past monday was one of those days for me....)

    be careful out there!

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  20. ahaha, michelle this made my day. only on public transit.

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  21. Ahaha wow! I need to start riding the bus more often!

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  22. I AM DYING!!!! Wow... some fabulous entertainment. I don't even understand why the Trayvon Martin card got pulled and honestly am sick of that shit but whatever! Gotta love America....

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  23. I look forward to your blog every day. This one made me laugh and I had to share it with my husband because we live in FL and he totally appreciated it.

    Thank you!

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  24. Haha, awesome! I was expecting the bus driver to freak out on the white guy...great twist in the plot ;)

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  25. I love your blog, I laugh out loud at almost every single post! Thanks for sharing your life with us!

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  26. Hahahahahaha they've probably all lived in SF too long to be fazed.

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  27. Hahaha, oh my goodness, my bus rides are not as crazy as that although if I was ever caught in the middle of it... I wouldn't even know what to do :S

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  28. That is the funniest story - laughed out loud.

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  29. literally i want your life! and all of the gifs representing you are faces that i make on the daily and want someone to make a gif of. not that that's particularly relevant to your story but i'm glad that there are other people (you) that make those faces when weird shit happens. find a new bus to take btw.

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  30. Lol SF public transportation is pure entertainment! I do not miss riding the Bart everyday but I do miss the constant entertainment it provided haha.

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  31. Hahaha! I am LMAO! Someone else said they showed this to their husband, and it's so true living in Florida this happens almost every day! This post was great. Especially your Giffs! Hahaha love it!

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  32. Oh the stories we could share!

    I ride the bus to/from work every day- which isn't really a popular choice in Hawaii. Yes, we have a lot of commuters and our buses are full, but it's more of a "have to" choice here than a "choose to"... anyway.

    Did I tell you about the time the police came on board and escorted a passenger off because he had a concealed weapon? Yeah, that was fun...

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  33. I absolutely loved this post! When I lived in Los Angeles I took public transportation and every morning was a new adventure! CRAZY! I found you on Twitter and am you newest follower! :) Have a great weekend! www.lookingtothestars.com

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  34. Lol!! Gosh, you just need to WAKE UP!! I would be you in that situation. I love the pictures and gifs. It went perfectly :)

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  35. Hysterical. None of it makes sense. Knowing me, I would have lost it and started laughing while all this was taking place. I'm terrible at hiding my humor.

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