Tuesday, August 13, 2013

I think my dad is part of a Korean Cult.

I had the quickest of all quick trips to San Diego. I mean seriously, I blinked and it was over. And it was one of those weekends where, at the end of it, you felt like you had zero sleep, zero recovery time, and then all of a sudden it was Monday again. But hey, c'est la vie, right?

Here's a quick run-down of my weekend.

After having a flight-delay scare with Southwest that would have set me back 2 HOURS, I used my ninja stealth skills and hopped on the earlier, sold-out, flight, landing me in San Diego ahead of schedule! #thankyousouthwest

I suppose that didn't matter though, because if you know anything about Fasha, it's that he can't be on time FOR THE LIFE OF HIM. Seriously. A GUN could be pointed at his HEAD and all he had to do to live was be somewhere on time, and he still would be late. Boom. Dead. (Too morbid? Sorry. I'm trying to make a point here.)

But anyway, he made up for it by performing his newest Korean karaoke song in the car for me.


This was followed by telling me his top 3 singing tips:

1. Practice the song 100 times.

"Literally 100 hundred times, Dad?" I asked.

"Yes, Shella. Literally 100 times. This is what I did for this song and then when I performed it, everyone said how amazing I sounded."

Notice how he uses the word "performed" when referencing karaoke.

2. When the singer breathes. You breathe.

3. Pick a song that is in your voice range. He said he "attempted to perfect a Michael Jackson song, but it was too high for him and it could not be done." End quote.

He then put on "Eye of the Tiger" and asked me to break down the words of what they were actually saying because this is the next song he wants to perfect and perform via karaoke in front of all his Korean friends at their next get together.

Oh boy.

Moving on.

We got home, and there were several cars lining the streets outside of the house. Including this wonderfully parallel parked car on the driveway. Just sitting there. Sideways.

A poorly parked car could only mean one thing.

Asians were near.

And yes, yes there were. A handful of his Korean friends were all upstairs in MY OLD ROOM, sitting around a table, facing a giant TV. After he had me say hello and awkwardly attempt my poor Korean (aka ZERO Korean skills at all), they proceeded to turn the TV on to watch a "Korean sermon" of some sorts.

I high-tailed it out of there as fast as I could and proceeded to the nearest bar.

But not before seeing this ensemble:

This is their living room on a daily basis.

A TV for karaoke and Korean soap dramas, and a golf setup so Fasha can practice his swing.

Oh, and you see that rug up there?

Apparently that's their bed too. Because when I came home Friday night after drinks with friends, Princess Sophia was sprawled out on the rug with a blankie and pillow. I was only mildly startled when I turned on the lights to find her there.

So anyway, come Saturday, I spent the day with my brother, sister-in-law, and my 9 month old niece. Now, take note, I haven't seen this little babe for 3 months, so I guess it's pretty understandable that she would often give me looks of confusion, mild uncertainty, and perhaps slight intrigue.

It's okay though, by the end of the trip, we were fast besties.


So you'd think Saturday night, after Fasha's long day of GOLF, he'd perhaps make time to spend with his daughter after 9 long months of not seeing her.

But, no.

Fasha had other plans.

He had 15 of his closest friends over again. Up in that make-shift chapel of his. Watching some Korean sermon again, with probably some karaoke to follow.

THEN, as if all of that Korean worshiping wasn't enough, Sunday morning rolled around and I heard Fasha and Princess in the "Chapel" - AKA, may I remind you again, MY OLD ROOM - listening to yet ANOTHER Korean sermon and praying. In Korean. Loudly.

I should have videoed it. I really should have. I think I was just too stunned to move.

So then, Fasha graciously took me back to the airport, after a lunch of In N Out, handed me a wad of cash and hugged me goodbye.

And that's it. That really happened.

I don't have many words on that whole situation. It baffles me at times, that's for sure. He's an odd one. But what can I do? Sit back and complain or sit back and watch in wonderment?

I pick wonderment.

All in all, I really did have a great trip. The moment I stepped off the plane, and that 75 degree weather hit my face, I instantly missed San Diego. Seeing my old friends and spending time with family made the memories of living there come rushing back. I definitely had a lot of mixed emotions leaving Sunday. But then, when I touched down in San Francisco, hugged my Boo-Dizzle again, and saw the fog rolling in, I must say, I felt pretty lucky to call that my home, too.

Over and out.


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  1. I need you to visit San Diego & Fasha more often. These stories always make me lol.

  2. A poorly parked car could only mean one thing. Asians were near. -- too funny.

  3. Oh my. I really hope I get to meet your dad some day.

  4. this is so excellent. ps that niece of yours? too cute.

  5. When I come to visit, please let's go to San Diego for a visit with Fasha and Princess. Also, will he read this post and laugh?? haha!

    1. Oh he will most definitely laugh. Anything I make fun of him for on this blog has already been made fun of to his face ;)


  6. Lmao...my mom moved out all the furniture in the living room and has a futon mattress on the floor. Her tv console is practically identical to your dads...where she watches 12 hours a day of Korean soap operas.

  7. We would get along great! I love me some Karaoke and actually kind of do wish I had a machine at home!!!

  8. This post is too funny! I'm glad you had a good time and decided to go with the wonderment instead of complaining :)

  9. LOL you are my favorite person ever. This post was full of so many amazing moments I don't even know where to start... Okay I do. THAT PARKING JOB!?!? lol I just adore Fasha, even if he is in an odd Korean cult.

  10. Seriousy EVER. SINGLE. BLOG. I am laughing this was hilarious! Sorry Fasha didn't spend more time with you, but I am thankful for the great stories! :)

  11. "Asians were near." OMG, so funny! I can't believe they've converted your room into their cult meeting place.

  12. "But what can I do? Sit back and complain or sit back and watch in wonderment?". An excellent perspective on those wacky curveballs life throws at us. On lighter note I love your posts on Fasha and Princess Sophia. They are always so funny and make me laugh.

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