Friday, October 26, 2012

That time he was a hero and called me his wife.

A few hours before those Vegas Demons {aka alcohol and food death recipe} tried to exit my body for 6 hours straight, The Dizzle and I thought it would be a great idea to purchase tickets for that night's show of Mystère performed by Cirque du Soleil.

I had always wanted to see them in Vegas and what better time than on what could be our last trip to Las Vegas for who knows how long.

So we marched ourselves up to that counter, purchased $170 tickets for that night's 9:30pm show.

Fast forward several hours of gambling, drinking, and eating to when we decided to go up to the room and take a nap at 7pm.

You know, just a little refresher before showtime.

Well, then, you know the rest of that story.
I woke up to what would be the worst 6 hours of my life and got very acquainted with Treasure Island's Porcelain King.

But here's part of the story I didn't share yesterday.

At around 8:50pm, with a slight break in-between vomit sessions, The Dizzle kindly asked me if he thought I could make it to the show in a few minutes.

The look on my puffy, pale face must have told him enough because he promptly got on the phone and called the front desk.

He said in his most professional and grown-up voice, 

"Hello Sir, I'm having a bit of a problem. We purchased tickets to Mystère tonight, but my wife is terribly ill and we need to cancel our tickets."

My pukey, pale ears perked up at that word.


I wondered if people were taken more seriously if they were married?

Needless to say, the front desk could not help him and he would have to go down to the ticket counter.

We agreed that if we could get a refund, we wouldn't go to the show.
But if they gave him trouble, I would try to pull it together and come down to meet him.

So he left, determined.

Several minutes passed, as well as several dry-heaves.

I gave him a call.

Things weren't looking good. They refused to refund our tickets.

I hung up the phone, took a deep breath, piled my hair on my head, put on my flip-flops, then did one last vomit for good measure.

I slowly made it down to the scene.

There was my man, standing tall at the ticket line, with the manager in tow.

I walked up to a lot of silent stares between them then showed them my best "sick" face I could muster.
Which probably took no effort on my part because I looked like hell.

But still, they wouldn't budge!

So The Dizzle asked them, 

"So you'd rather us sit in a show where my wife will probably vomit in there than refund our tickets?"

There was that word again.

But it didn't work. No refund.

You know what V Dizz also did?

He shouted to the crowd like a determined fool and tried to sell our tickets like some illegal scalper!

I've never seen such dedication!

But, of course, no one wanted to buy them from the "stubborn husband and sickly wife."

Slightly defeated, I took a deep breath, grabbed some water, and we found our seats in the auditorium.

About 3 minutes after sitting down, I had to go find the restroom.


I threw up what little water I had consumed, then headed back to my seat.

Then. Oh, then.

My precious Dizzle came up with a brilliant plan as I tried my hardest not to throw up on the person sitting in front of me.

He marched right back out of that auditorium and right back up to that ticket counter and said the following:

"You mentioned you couldn't refund the tickets because it's not before 4pm, correct?"


"You mentioned that you could not refund our tickets, but you could move our tickets to another date, correct?"


"So I would like to move our tickets to tomorrow's show. Then, I would like to cancel those tickets because it is before the 4pm deadline."

The ticket lady looked at him stunned, possibly gasped a little, told him he was very clever, then refunded the tickets.


He came and whisked me from my seat, full of much deserved pride.

I thanked him, hugged him, kissed him, then threw up for the next 5 hours.

My hero.




  1. I knew he was a keeper. I bet he did all of this with that pink shirt.

  2. Oh that Verner - that clever mind will come in handy overseas I'm sure!

  3. Aw... how adorable. Sorry you were sick on your trip.

  4. What a crafty smarty pants that "husband" of yours is!

    And you know what? I totally understand why he called you his wife. Married couples DO get treated differently than dating couples when it comes to customer service matters. Trust me. I know. My husband and I bought a home before we were married, and I had to say I was his wife to get the alarm company and internet/TV company to help me with anything. Once we learned that lesson, we were "husband and wife" any time we needed help with something! Haha!

    I am glad you aren't dry-heaving constantly anymore. :) Happy Friday!

  5. what a smarty pants! you've got a keeper!

  6. Ahh... witty, witty! I don't think myself or my hubby would come up with that trick!!

  7. Oh my gosh, how WONDERFUL of him! I'm sure he meant the wife comment meaning that he'd love for you to be his wife one day. And oh so clever he is. Hero indeed!!!

  8. Ahhh, the "W" word. It is music to your ears?! :)

  9. What a smarty pants! I wouldn't have even thought to do that. And yes, people who are married apparently get treated more seriously than non married people. It's a crying shame.

  10. That man is a keeper, yes, he is! Not only for the "wife" reference, but because in just a short amount of time, just one emergency trip to the theater rest room, he came up with that out. AND THE WOMAN HAD TO REFUND HIM THE MONEY! That is the most awesome story! Love it!!!

  11. Oh man, I remember hearing Jared call me his wife once before we were married, and I was so flustered. I loved it. I was like he wants me for all time and eternity - and probably took the whole situation overboard :)! Your man is awesome, that cleverness will always come in handy!

  12. Ahhhh the wit of a man ... It's awesome when it works in your favor and deadly when debating over any subject that he's opposed to haha! I would've liked to have seen the ticket lady's face when he told her that! Glad all is well now :)

  13. Minus the being sick and puking... that is a really great story. What a great person to travel the world with. :)

  14. Loved this story--even though you were terribly sick! That man of yours is keep for sure :)

  15. very clever, indeed! sorry you were sick though!

  16. well played! & sorry to hear you were ill!

  17. That's what I've learned to do with hotels too if you are past the cancellation date. Just modify the reservation for a later date, then cancel it at no charge. Boom! Smart guy you got there. Did your uterus do a little dance when he said "wife"?

  18. Wow, such a smart man. Definitely a keeper.

    I work in an entertainment company that deals with events like this. So I'm not at all surprised that they stuck to the no refund policy so adamantly. We have a very strict no refund/cancellation/exchange policy and there really are no exceptions. But good on him for finding a work around! I always felt really bad telling people I couldn't refund them when they had legit reasons for wanting one. :(

  19. you have a brilliant one on your hands! good thinking Drizzle!

  20. Ah, I'm getting sick just thinking about this nightmare! What jerks to make you guys go through loopholes, but your boyfriend sounds like a true gentlemen!

  21. That was so smart of him!! I don't think I ever would have thought of that! I'm very impressed. And Lindsay is right, you get so much more respect when you act married. It's so stupid, but so true. For some reason a legal contract that says you're stuck with each other means you can get things easier. Must be cuz people feel bad ;)

  22. aawwwwww seriously sooooo freakin sweet!!! <3

  23. smart and good looking? you have yourself a keeper! ;)

  24. That sweet, sweet "husband" of yours :) I swear married couples do get treated differently- taken more serious than the rest of us! I'm so glad he got them to give you tickets for the next night so you could enjoy the show! That's the only Cirque show I haven't seen! How was it?! Glad you're feeling better :)

  25. Hahaha this is a great story! How smart is your "husband" lol!?

    I swear married people to get treated different. Whenever I talk to the electricity / internet companies on the phone I always refer to my boyfriend as my "partner". It just feels so much more grown up and they respond differently than when I say "boyfriend", it's so silly!

  26. That is incredibly brilliant! I like The Dizzle's style - definitely something I would do! Haha

  27. BEST. BLOGPOST. EVER. That's a pretty great man you have!

  28. I want a V Dizz. This is the best story I have ever read. I died. My sentences are short. I'm flustered.


  29. That's so ridiculous they wouldn't refund the tickets!! But man, what an awesome way out! Smart man.

  30. OK, so when's the wedding? He's a keeper!

  31. Awww that is a sweet story and the lady at the counter was right....he was very clever!! nice loophole to know if that ever happens :)

  32. This is BRILLIANT. And AMAZING.

    Maybe you actually got married and were too drunk to remember?

  33. I always say "my fiance" if it's something semi-serious or important. :P



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