Thursday, September 13, 2012

I just need to be a sexy French Maid

{He made me smile with "Moving In Together" flowers. He made me wary with a 6:30am run}

After I announced The Dizzle and I moving in together, I found it pretty hilarious that about 99% of the tips and advice I got was to help prepare me for what I like to call: The Man Slob.

I got several warnings for the following situations:

Toilet seat will be left up.
Clothes will be left on the floor.
He will not do the dishes.
He won't put things back in the right place.

...

Friends, the reason why I laugh is because you all should be warning him about me.

For basically all of those things.

Except the toilet.

I think I can manage to pee with the seat down. We'll see.

Anyway, after Monday's post, The Dizzle wanted to make sure it was made very clear 
"who the clean one is in this relationship."

Okay, okay, it's him! He's so gosh darn CLEAN!
I don't know what his mother did, but boy did she raise him right!

He hangs up his wet towels.
He cleans dirty dishes (the same night after cooking!).
He puts that dang toilet seat down after every pee sesh.
He makes the bed every.single.morning.
He does the laundry and then, get this, puts his clothes away!
Not 2 weeks later. But THAT DAY!

I'm astounded! I'm impressed!

But mostly, I'm anxiety ridden.

Why?

Because I was a spoiled rotten child who had cleaning ladies come to my home every Friday to pick up after my spoiled rotten behind.

I'm not proud of this fact.

But truth be told, I really am trying.

And you're darn right I like to make it known every time I do something positive:

"Look honey, I'm hanging up my towel!"
"Boo! Did you see that I made the bed?!"
"Look at me! I'm putting the dishes away AND 
I didn't leave the dishwasher door wide open for you to trip on!"

It's those little affirmations I get from him that keep me going.
In fact, if he could get some sort of gold star chart going, that would make me pretty happy...

Anyway, if I could be less like this:


And more like this:


Then I think the two of us as roommates will be juuuusssstttt fine.
You feelin' me?

...

xoxo

26 comments:

  1. Joe used to be the clean one in our relationship too but something happened and it switched - I'm not sure I like it this way.

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  2. Hahaha girl I'm the asme way. I am the worst when it comes to cleaning. Our bedroom is a perfect example. LoLo's side is perfect and neat and mine has clothes everywhere. But I make up for it other ways.... Like taking care of the dog or the dishes or cooking once or twice.

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  3. hahah! I don't think me OR my boyfriend is the cleaner one, which is kind of scary, but I know he wouldn't be mad with the French maid idea.

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  4. I feel you. I was spoiled brat too but now I have to be the example bc my husband is most def NOT like your b/f. He's done a lot better now that we're married and all and I force him to pick up after himself, but yikes...for a while it was bad. You are TOTES lucky g/f ;)

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  5. Girl, I feel you for sure!! While Kendol is messy, I can't say a word. I'm just as messy! But maybe if we all got the little french maid costumes, our messiness wouldn't be as obvious??? HA!! It's all about the distractions.

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  6. hahaha! I was a spoiled brat too. I hate cleaning but I do it...it just takes a pep talk. I'm sure Dizzle would love you to clean in a little french maid outfit. your chart would be full of gold stars!

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  7. Lol I knew he looked like the clean type of boyfriend! My bf is immaculately clean! I dunno where boys get this stereotype that they're all slobs...are some of them slobs? Sure. But definitely not every.single.guy. Don't worry about being messy, his clean ways will rub off on you :) And I think a gold star chart is an awesome idea!!

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  8. Oh boyyyyy good luck with this. Moving in together is GREAT. And your will learn a lot about each other. All modesty goes out the window. I've got many more stories I could share given that I've been living with Chris for 2+ years now. ... But it's too graphic for your blog. Jk. but...

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  9. I found you over on This is my real hair guest blogging; your site is so cute! Very funny. I'm following now!

    Check me out!

    Tara

    http://tarabelle-adropofink.blogspot.com/

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  10. Hahaha admitting the problem is the first step to recovery!

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  11. Oh how this cracked me up, as this pretty much sums up me and my husband's relationship. After five years together, his cleanliness still surprises me. And I try to be cleaner, I really truly do, but it's just not innate to me. Breaking an almost 30 habit of not being clean is not easy to do!

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  12. Hahahaha.

    Disregard everything I wrote to you in that post.

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  13. Hahaha....I am totally like you. When the Hubs and I moved in together we used to get in these AWFUL fights because he was neat and I was messy. I had no problem leaving dishes in the sink for 2 days, or piling my clothes on the floor. After 4 years of living together, I have gotten much better at cleaning! You'll get there! Though there are a few things I do better than him - put away the dishes, or keep my stuff away. But it wasn't always that way....you'll be fine!! :D

    The Blue Hour

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  14. I'm the same way. Though Ive tried,after six years of marriage it's still the same. He still gets annoyed by my little messes.

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  15. HAHAHA yesssss! Amazing. My man's super clean too. Like, he does that same thing with the dishes-the-same-night thing. That was the biggest shock to me. Whaaaat? You mean, you don't just let them "soak" in the sink (aka excuse to leave them there for longer because you're too lazy to scrub them right away)?! Yeah, hey, all I can say is we are lucky biatches.

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  16. Same thing with my husband and myself! Sometimes I hate that he's so clean because it makes me look even worse!

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  17. Lol my piece of advice wasn't about the cleanliness so HA. I had a feeling you would be the messy one anyways, something about VDizzle just screams well kept. You on the other hand, phew. ;)

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  18. Congratulations on the moving in step! My bf is so much cleaner than I am. His apartment is spotless. Mine is cluttery. Moving in together will be interesting and so much fun! Good luck!

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  19. omg do you know how awesome it will be to have a maid around my place!!! to come home to a clean kitchen and to never have to wash my clothes!?!? *sigh* maybe one day!!



    http://infinitelifefitness.com
    http://mscomposure.blogspot.com

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  20. Haha this is too funny!! I would love have a maid...but until then I will fill that role lol.

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  21. Good for him to stand up for himself! I'm so happy for you that he is clean. I guess I'm not surprised you are the slightly messier one because opposites attract. It'd be uber creepy if both of you were neat.

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  22. Hey, I didn't hear you complaining about cleaning ladies when they were picking up your stuff! You should have let me know, I could have told them to skip your room just to give you the practice of cleaning. Oh, and PS. you sloppy kids took after your father~!

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  23. I swear you make me laugh hysterically and I know exactly what you mean. Don't you love the commercials where the wife is quickly vacuuming and straightening the house in heels? I never look like that. Usually I'm debating whether I can get trajectory going to throw the garbage for 10 points versus actually getting up. My husband is a clean freak and I am quite possibly on the furthest end of that spectrum. I'm more like casual clean, while he dabbles with the label of "clean freak." If all else fails, you can distract him by putting on a maid outfit. That should buy you some time lol.

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  24. I only wanted to kill Ammon for the first year we lived together. We're starting to even out now, slowly but surely. There is certainly an adjustment period, that's for sure. Sounds like your guys' relationship roles are reversed from our though; I have certainly thought about buying Ammon a Butler's uniform and telling him to get to it.

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  25. Thank goodness one of you is clean. D and I are plagued with BOTH being slobs. Haha...and even after 5 years of living together, I still make it known when I do things..."hey did you notice I vacuumed?!" (yeah, that happens like once every six months).

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  26. Bwahahah. Ok, ok, I have to admit that I'm not the cleanest person ever. Just last week, I dusted for the first time since I moved in (LAST YEAR!) and there was dirt caked on the dirt. I wasn't very proud of that moment because, well... I'm supposed to be like one of those french maids. I houseclean as a part-time job, lol. But my boyfriend is messier than I am! And that's where the problems start. Because he'll mix the clean & dirty dishes together or NOT flush. C'mon, that's just naaaasty.

    xo, Adriana.

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